Who is your Daddy?

Who is your Daddy?

Everyone knows of the infamous phrase: “I’ll be back”. It is one that is inextricably linked to Arnold Schwarzenegger and his portrayal of a cyborg assassin in the 1984 movie The Terminator. 

The thing about Arnold is that his acting skills have never really been very good.

Read More

Business in the Front, Party in the Back!

Business in the Front, Party in the Back!

I hail from the small town of Benoni. The same prestigious little place that the gorgeous blonde bombshell’s Charlize Theron and Charlene Woodstock originate from. Of course, that is not all that Benoni is known for.

Other than Benoni’s landmark mine dumps and scenic lake-view vista’s, the small little town is renowned for people who religiously choose to continuously dress like they are stuck in an episode of MacGuyver.

Their most notable trademark? The “Benoni Pony” – also known as a ‘mullet’.

Read More

The One Who Changed The World

The One Who Changed The World


“Three Apples changed the world: One seduced Eve, One awakened Newton and One fell into the hands of Steve Jobs”

Steve Jobs has passed away.

My sincerest condolences to his family.

Read More

Damn you, Autocorrect!

Damn Autocorrect

Anyone with a modern mobile device knows how much of a bane and a blessing the autocorrect feature can be when typing out text messages, emails, notes and so on.

Often the autocorrect feature will change perfect text, without rhyme or reason, and before you realise the error, you have already hit send.

These ‘corrections’ almost always result in a bevy of hilarious, if not mortifying, messages to friends, loved ones, strangers or colleagues.

Consequently, the Internet is a buzz with this latest meme.

Read More

Poodle Doodles

A new trend has emerged. That of turning your beloved canine friend into a mobile work of ‘art’. I use the term ‘art’ loosely here, of course.

Essentially people are cutting and dying the hair of poodles and other unfortunately fluffy dogs, to resemble other creatures, such as Panda’s, Pirates and Fairy’s. It is as crazy as it sounds and the results are just as mind numbingly hilarious.

Read More

Tomorrow, and Tomorrow, and Tomorrow

Well there go my 2010 New Years Resolutions.

Yes, I have been quite the slacker when it comes to updating my blog. I have no excuses this time though. Truth be told, I have just not felt like updating.

Shakespeare - To Blog or not to Blog

(Picture courtesy of AlaaShaker)

Read More

I never thought it would happen to me…

Credit Card FraudLast night I received a chilling phone call from Nedbank. Someone had attempted to make an online purchase using my credit card information.

I was, and still am, gob smacked.

I am no novice when it comes to shopping online. I have been doing it for years. I am quite a tech savvy person and I have a vested interest in computers, social media and the Internet. So I know all about the dangers of shopping online. Consequently, I always take the necessary precautions to prevent data theft. Nevertheless, this did not stop some random American douche bag, from stealing my credit card information and attempting to buy… wait for it… R3 000 worth of groceries from Wal-Mart. Huh?!

Why on Earth someone would go through all of the effort to steal someone’s credit card information online, just to buy groceries with, I cannot understand. Either the recession in the states is really still quite bad or Americans, as the stereotype goes, are legitimately stupid. Nevertheless, I hope this person gets persecuted to the full extent of the law and is ripped a new one while in prison.

So how did this all happen? How the heck did this mystery person obtain my information? Well, it was obviously via the internet but not because of some insecure site.

Read More

“I’m ready for dream time, Mr. B”!

Bioshock Cosplay

Bioshock 2? No, this photograph is not a screen capture of the sequel to 2007’s sleeper hit. It is, in fact, an amazingly designed cosplay creation.

This incredible Big Daddy and Little Sister cosplay combination was created by none other than the now infamous Harrison Krix – who previously created a replica of the Little Sister ADAM syringe. To say that this man is merely talented, is truly a vast understatement.

I finally lost my mind enough to try to tackle one of these big guys. For those unfamiliar, Big Daddy’s are the protectors of the Little Sisters in Rapture, an underwater city devoid of morality which has degenerated into chaos and insanity. They are huge, fast, strong, and as it turns out, a solid pain in the ass to build.

- Harrison Krix (2009)

After eight weeks of work, Krix officially unveiled his creation with a magnificent photographic gallery taken at an aquarium in Georgia in the United States. Although no where near as hot as the Pikachu cosplay I previously reported on, his work is by no means any less impressive. Check it out!

Even cooler, it turns out that Krix is actually the man in the Big Daddy suit, with the Little Sister being represented by his fiancé and soon to be wife. Furthermore, Krix owns and runs Volpin Props, a replica and prop design studio and workshop. Subsequently he does do commission work *cue geekasm’s*, but is said to be quite busy until the second half of 2010.

I can honestly say, that I would love a Big Daddy costume. Even if only to run around the backyard tormenting our hyperactive Bouvier pup! One can dream…

Until the next time “Milieunairs”!

 

Bookmark and Share

Read More

Separated at Birth?! – Rihanna and Adam Lambert

Courtesy of Twitter, I was notified that the recent American Idol winner runner-up, Adam Lambert, was releasing his new album. My first response: “If he is not the winner, then who the heck is”?

A quick Google search informed me that the legitimate winner of the last season of American Idol was actually Kris Allen. Who would have thought, considering that Adam “media-whore-and-loving-it” Lambert is the one stealing all of the spotlight!

Truth be told, the last time I actually watched any variant of the show was when local Anke Pietrangeli beat out Pussy Poseletso Sejosingoe for the top spot, back in 2003 on the South African version of the show. Since then, I have pretty much lost all interest in anything Idols related.

However, what I do care about is when I have to begin pulling out facial recognition software to correctly identify artists. Case in point: Rihanna VS Adam Lambert.

Seperated at Birth? - Rihanna and Adam Lambert

Molly good golly do these two look alike!

Even though we all know that Rihanna had some unwilling and unconventional ‘remodeling done’, one would be hard pressed to deny the similarities between everyone’s favourite Jamaican princess and American’s latest flamboyant Queen. That said, would it not be delicious if it was uncovered that one of these two ‘stars’ was, in fact, an illegitimate love child?

I can already picture the headline on the next cover of Heat - “Exclusive: Lambert is Rihanna’s brother, but he was too ‘White’ to keep”. Alternatively, and of course the most likely scenario, is that someone at Lambert’s record label got a little too excited with Photoshop – 21st century technologies, “making you look like everybody else”!

Rihanna - Rated RAs if the two stars looking alike was not enough, both are releasing their new albums on the same day, Monday the 23rd of November 2009.

To ensure that you do not accidentally buy the wrong album, which you would be forgiven for given the ‘twin’ factor, Lambert’s debut album is entitled For Your Entertainment, which is also blue and sparkly, whereas Rihanna’s latest album is called Rated R, which is all dark and ‘emo’.

Since both albums are hitting the streets on the same day, which are you going to “buy” first?

 

 

Until the next time “Milieunairs”!

 

Bookmark and Share

Read More

South African’s are Twitterholics

SA 10th in Twitter Well tickle my nipples and call me Bob! South Africa has become the 10th largest user of Twitter in the world.

According to Canadian research company Sysomos, South African Twitter users make up 0.85% of total online Twitter interaction, beating Japan (0.71%), the Philippines (0.64%) and China (0.49%) to a spot in the top 10. Quite impressive for a third world country, hey?

Overall though, the US is the winner by quite a large margin with 62.14% of the world’s users, followed by the UK (7.87%), Canada (5.69%) and Australia (2.8%).

According to the study, Twitter attracts around 55 million unique visitors worldwide per month! Of that figure, 0.85% are South African. That amounts to about 467 500 SA visitors per month. Can you believe that? Almost half a million South Africans log on to Twitter each month. Incredible!

Looking at the popularity of Twitter today, it is amazing to think that it all started as a simple pet project in Evan Williams’ basement, way back in March of 2006. Since that time Twitter has become the world’s most popular social networking and micro-blogging site, attracting celebrity users such as Oprah, and a growing mountain of media and blog coverage. In all honesty, I use Twitter so frequently, that I sometimes wonder why no one thought of it any sooner.

[Sources: News24, IOL]

 

For those who still do not know, you can follow my Twitter here: www.twitter.com/HansHaupt.

 

Until the next time “Milieunairs”!

 

Bookmark and Share

Read More

Paranormal Activity – Trailer

Paranormal Activity - It's coming... Do you like being scared witless by nausea inducing camera work? If so, I have some good news. It looks like we may have another Blair Witch-esque movie coming our way called ‘Paranormal Activity’.

“A young couple suspects that their house is haunted by a malevolent entity. They set up video surveillance to capture evidence of what happens at night as they sleep. Their surveillance and home videos have been edited into the 99 minute feature film Paranormal Activity”.

The trailer alone has enough content to run Goosebumps up and down my spine. I have included it in this post, for your chilling pleasure:

Paranormal Activity – Official Trailer

I am not sure when this fright fest will be making it’s way to our shores, but when it does, you can bet your lily whites that I will post a teeth chattering review.

Until the next time “Milieunairs”!

 

Bookmark and Share

Read More

Did the Soviet Army invent Breakdancing?

Other than the KGB, playing Russian Roulette, drinking copious amounts of Vodka and selling their women online *cough* Russian brides *cough*, it turns out that those Russians also know how to ‘spank those planks’.

 

Soviet Army invented Breakdancing?

 

I have got to give it to those soldiers. When you can move like that, who needs guns?

Until the next time “Milieunairs”!

 

Bookmark and Share

Read More

Marge Simpson, quite the kinky cougar

Marge Simpson - Playboy Covergirl: November 2009 (TMZ.com)

It all started with this tweet:

“Marge Simpson has a surprise for her fans in the November issue of Playboy” ~ High Hefner

Back in August, courtesy of Twitter, Hugh Hefner hinted that everyone’s favourite blue haired cartoon character, the lovely Marge Simpson, may appear in the November issue of Playboy magazine. Today, TMZ broke the news that good old Marge will, in fact, be the cover girl of the November issue.

Marge, it appears, is quite the kinky cougar and will be ‘appearing’ in Playboy to celebrate the 20th Anniversary of the Simpsons. TMZ also reported that she will even have a three page spread in the magazine, where she will not only show off her “bangin bod” but also a variety of ultra sexy cartoon lingerie.

It is worth noting that there will be a ‘real-life’ human Playboy Playmate in the issue as well. Just in case ‘hentai’ is not a part of your forte. Doh!

Bear in mind that Marge Simpson is by no means a stranger when it comes to appearing in or on Magazines. Other than Playboy, she has also adorned the cover of Maxim magazine and was given a spread in Harper’s Bazaar, among others.

UPDATE: Check out the album for a myriad of photographs including the November 2009 Playboy spread featuring Marge Simpson herself (NSFW: Cartoon nipples)!

There is no doubt that Homer will be downing a keg of Duff beer in celebration of his wife’s achievement, whereas Bart will have to fend off his horny-short-eating friends, while Lisa runs a campaign to promote feminine empowerment. Maggie will no doubt suck her dummy while continuing to plan for world domination. Until then, let’s celebrate with Marge… by crumping!

Marge Simpson Crumping – Victory!

Until the next time “Milieunairs”!

Bookmark and Share

Read More

Moon… Kaboom!

So let me get this straight… NASA are set to anal-probe the dark side of the Moon, in order to discover the possibility of the presence of water?Moon - Sattelite & Rocket

I am not sure when the idea of molesting the Moon became a good idea, but this has the potential to end rather disastrously. To make my point even clearer, NASA is not even denying that ‘big surprises’ lie in wait:

"We’re not 100 percent sure what will happen, and big surprises are possible" ~ Brian Day of the NASA/Ames Research Center in California

As if the myriad of blockbuster movies detailing the end of the world was not enough, along with the most recent ramblings of 2012 being the end, courtesy of those blasted Mayans; how on Earth does this seem like a good idea?

Moon - The MoonMoon - Breaking

 

 

 

          =

 

 

 

Several possible outcomes exist from this scientific endeavour.

  • The scientists will discover water on the Moon; resulting in copious geekasm’s.
  • The scientists will not discover water on the Moon; resulting in a potential rise in suicide’s.
  • The Moon will be knocked off orbit or into a rotation of some kind; resulting in the end of the world.
  • The Moon may crack and shatter; resulting in the end of the world.
  • The aliens may declare this ‘scientific experiment’ as an ‘act of war’ and in direct violation of the Intergalactic Space Federation’s peace clause, due to the unlawful battering of a celestial body; resulting in the end of the world.

Well, whatever the outcome, I will be sure to reserve my front row seat to this ambiguous ‘surprise’ laden event. For those who are interested, the Moon is set to be violated today at 13:30 (GMT+2). You may watch the event unfold online here or watch it ‘live’ below.

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

Interested to know more?

Until the next time “Milieunairs”!

 

Bookmark and Share

Read More

Amazing Number ’9′

9 9 9 Today the date and time reflected the following:

09:09 09/09/09

This sequence of numbers can only take place once a century (100 years). It is a repetitive sequence of numbers that we have become accustomed to since the dawn of the new millennium, in the year 2000.

Personally, I have a total of nine letters in my name and surname: Hans Haupt. Coincidentally, my astrological lucky numbers are meant to be both five and nine and I was born on a Wednesday, which is meant to be my lucky day.

As it so happens, the word September and the day Wednesday are each made up of nine letters. Furthermore, today is the 252nd day of the year, thus 2+5+2 = 9. Amazing, don’t you think?

To celebrate this date, I have scoured the internet for nine interesting facts relating to the number nine.

  1. Cats are said to have nine lives.
  2. If you multiply nine by any whole number (except zero), and repeatedly add the digits of the answer until it’s just one digit, you will end up with nine. For example:
    3 × 9 = 27 (2 + 7 = 9)
    9 × 9 = 81 (8 + 1 = 9)
    121 × 9 = 1089 (1 + 0 + 8 + 9 = 18; 1 + 8 = 9)
    234 × 9 = 2106 (2 + 1 + 0 + 6 = 9)
  3. There are nine members of the Fellowship of the Ring in The Lord of the Rings saga, to balance and combat the nine Nazgûl.
  4. Water expands by about 9% as it freezes.
  5. The nine times tables are the only ones which can be done using just ones fingers. For example, if you wanted to calculate what 9 x 7 is, you would extend all ten fingers, then from the pinky on the left hand to the pinky on the right hand, count out seven fingers (the number being multiplied by nine). When you get to the seventh finger (which should be your index finger/pointing finger), bend your finger. The remaining fingers will give you the answer, which is 63 (six fingers remain before the bent finger and three fingers remain after).
  6. Nine is strongly associated with the Chinese dragon, a symbol of magic and power. There are nine forms of the dragon, it is described in terms of nine attributes, and it has nine children.
  7. Bart Simpson has nine spikes of hair (since the second season of The Simpsons).
  8. There are nine planets in our solar system (although this is now debatable).
  9. Nine months is the average gestational period for human babies to develop to full term.

If anyone else has any interesting facts pertaining to the ‘amazing number nine’, please do leave a comment.

Until the next time “Milieunairs”!

Bookmark and Share

Read More